consequences of no help mental health services

The only thing I can say is that Mental health services in the Wairarapa can thank their lucky stars that I am still alive as my suicide attempt the other day was serious but didn't eventuate in my death.

No thanks to them.

After the other night giving up and throwing in the towel and trying to commit suicide I decided to go back onto my Epilim tablets and now take 2 a day as of Wednesday this week.

I have to say after being on them a few days my mood has improved a bit, not a drastic lot but I have been able to get to work which I wasn't able to do Wednesday and Thursday of this week. So for me that is a slight improvement.

On the other hand my relationship with Lino is going nicely and I bought a car the other day.

But I am also losing my job on the 6 May 2016 which is devastating for me as I really did enjoy working in the clothing boutique and being sole charge. But I am trying to find another job through job brokers I know locally and just searching for work through the usual channels.

I will be sending a really long letter of complaint to HDC., the Commissioner, and the Wairarapa DHB for the way I have been treated lately. Because it is disgusting. Nobody should be treated this way, and if the Wairarapa Dhb mental health services were doing their job properly they would not send home a acutely suicidal person to take their life, or attempt.

For goodness sakes when I was in ED the crisis team didnt even come and see me! that is how freaking careless and stigmatised they are by my diagnosis which I do not think is the correct diagnosis anyways as I am CPTSD.

I am just so angry by the way I have been treated.

What was done by the Psychiatrist in the way of the medication was careless and thats what my pharmacist had to say that I should never of been taken off epillim in 6 days so quickly as it plays with the psychy of the brain. Have noticed a difference since started back on it. Hopefully in time I can get back to normality. Whatever that is. I do not know what that is after being dosed up with medication since I was 17 years of age!


Now I am fighting to get license back. But yea thats tricky too because due to the medication changes my mood state has been bumpy and I have been undertaking risky behaviour, and suicidal attempts. So I dont know when the license will be returned to me in the meantime will just have to make do with the bus.



So thats update with me. Wrote a public suicide note before I tried to take my life the other night but did not post it. I will not post it now/.


 look after yourselves